walking backwards

The Wind picked up last night. I could hear it beginning to roar outside my windows when I went to bed and at first I wondered if it would keep me awake. But no, the wind song became my lullaby, accompanied me in dreamland, and like a loving companion, she was still there in the morning. I woke to the sound of a Raven, there is no other sound like it in the world.

I don't know who (if anyone) will read my meanderings. I will do my best not to bore you. This blog will be some kind of mix of journaling about my work in Iqaluit for the Government of Nunavut and the ramblings of my mind.

I left my home in Guelph just one week ago today and following a lovely little "transition-time" with my own dear loving companion, the lovely Valerie, I flew into Iqaluit on February 1st. The last time that I flew into Iqaluit I was on the same airplane as the deceased body of a young Inuit woman that I once loved with all of my heart. One can walk backwards against the bitter wind but time appears to go in only one direction... forward. Daisy is gone and I am still here. I kind of always knew that there was work for me to do in Iqaluit. Can I be completely honest here? I probably could not have come to this town to do this work if Daisy was still alive. Our love was impossible, her addictions and her violence made it impossible. I don't understand the mysteries of life and death but my heart tells me that it was time for Daisy to go. Death had her in his grip in summer of 08 when she was involved in the crash that killed her cousin. She lived through that, I think because she had some work to do back home in Iqaluit. The next time Death came for her he did not let go.

My work here in Iqaluit is to start midwifery services at the Qikqiktani General Hospital (QGH). There is already a midwifery education program at Nunavut Arctic College (NAC) and having midwifery services in the hospital is a vital component of that education program. The volume of births in this hospital will provide the perfect training opportunity for the students. High quality prenatal and birthing services already exist in Iqaluit, delivered by doctors and nurses, most of whom, like me, come from other places. My job is to work with these other service providers and the women of Iqaluit and the rest of the region, to integrate midwifery services into the existing services. From my perspective, the most exciting thing about the work that I am here to do is the fact that NAC's midwifery program is for Inuit women. This is about capacity building. This is about Inuit women pushing their sweet little brown babies out into the hands of Inuit midwives. Walking backwards, back to a time of fierce strength, independence and resourcefulness. Blending the traditional art and science of midwifery with "modern" midwifery, reducing dependence on health care providers from away, improving the health and well-being of the people of this wild land. People walking forwards, facing the wind, smiling and laughing as they go.

I bundled up in warm clothing and went for a walk outside today. I have this excellent pullover parka with a fur trimmed hood. It is so warm and snug. I wasn't planning to be out for very long so i just wore the regular boots and put long underwear under my jeans. For longer walks I wear snow pants and "serious" boots. Its really cold out there. I don't know how cold in terms of the numbers. My friends and co-workers will know this about me. I am a "broad-stroke" person who prefers not to get bogged down in details like -32 and -50 with the wind chill. Cold is cold and very cold is very cold! Just me and the ravens out there today... everyone else in Iqaluit is using vehicles, stinking up the frozen air with exhaust fumes. The wind was at my back going down the hill and towards the library and in my face (except when I turned and walked backwards) as I made my way up the hill and home. When I came inside I ate an orange that has been sitting on the table looking gorgeous and yummy. Something about being here gives me a greater appreciation for the humble orange. I found myself thinking... how far has this orange traveled to be here in my hands on February 6th? And what was it like for the first Inuit person in this land when he or she first gathered the courage to taste an orange?